When I started Life and Science, I did so with the intention of becoming a science writer and working on my writing skills. Both still stand, however, I initially thought I’d stick to academic writing after I graduated. To be honest, I didn’t even know science communication was a thing, I just knew I wanted to write about science, and I definitely wasn’t aware that there were so many others who are doing or want to do the same thing as me. The more I looked into it, the more my appreciation for the art of written communication grew.
I decided earlier this year that I don’t want to go into academic writing. I want to be able to engage with a wider audience – offer them a bit more than facts on a screen; I want to have casual yet insightful conversations with people about the new things that I learn every time I write. Most importantly, for me, I was my blog to be a place of reflection.
With that said, it has been a difficult year for me. Although I have definitely been working on my writing skills behind the scene, I still harboured the same limiting beliefs that held me back from creating a blog at all. I wrote a lot, but in all honesty, I couldn’t be happy with any of it. It’s not even as if it sounded bad whenever I went back and read over everything. I just didn’t think it was good enough to be “out there.” I compared myself to other writers, those who are far more experienced and beat myself up over not being on their level. I had somehow managed to convince myself that unless I’m perfect at something I shouldn’t bother with it and move on to something else; the feeling of failure and rejection just isn’t worth it. I quickly found myself having the same belief about anything I wanted to try or already loved to do.
In hindsight, I realise I was being ridiculous. I was never really a perfectionist growing up and, although failure wasn’t an option (thanks to my Asian upbringing), I took mistakes or minor setbacks as things to learn from. Yet, at some point after reaching adulthood, I started to set myself up to a pretty harsh standard. I’ve read many blog posts and articles by people who have felt a similar way and I’m grateful for their transparency because it has been a wake-up call for me too.
So recently I made a promise to take it easy on myself and just… do it, and allow myself to actually enjoy doing it. There is absolutely no use in having such expectations if all they’re going to do is hold me back. And honestly, what do I have to lose? There’s always something to gain from every experience we have while reaching our goals, that will help us do better in one way or another.
That’s enough rambling for today, I think! I have a lot of ideas for my blog – different forms of writing and topics I want to experiment with – and I’m super excited to get into it all. But for now, I’m going to enjoy a cup of tea and look for a movie to watch.
Happy Sunday! x